← Autodidact Archive · Original Dissent · jay
Thread ID: 8259 | Posts: 2 | Started: 2003-07-19
2003-07-19 16:01 | User Profile
Couldn't you imagine the following prose in the old Grey LadY?
NY TIMES
July 31, 2004
Congress to be Offshored
Washington, D.C. - In a stunning development, American voters have agreed to send Congressional work overseas. The process, known as "offshoring", consists of training low-cost labor forces to do the work of higher priced American jobs.
"I never would've believed it would happen to me" sighed Senator Sam Brownback (R-KS) Brownback, known as "H1-B", fought to import over one million foreign IT workers into the USA. "I was just doing what I was told. How could they do it to me?"
In recent years, Congress has sat back and watched millions of jobs go overseas. The benefits of such legislation include increased profits and higher campaign contributions. But many critics said that the loss of American jobs hurts morale and lowers local tax bases. President Bush, in a tight fight for re-election, rejected Congressional offshoring. He advocated a plan called "Compassionate Congress" - whereby 535 Mexicans would be automatically imported from Central America to do the job. "They are our neighbors, and we will not allow them to live in poverty anymore" said the President.
The taxpayers estimate that the United States will save over 535 high-paying jobs, averaging $135,000 plus another $75,000 in benefits and pension. Julio Jimenez, concrete worker in Tucson, AZ was not aware of the changes. "I just worry about my 13 kids" said the illegal alien. "Hopefully, these peeps find other gigs. Our concrete firm is hiring."
2003-07-19 16:07 | User Profile
:lol: Would sure serve them right.