← Autodidact Archive · Original Dissent · Roy Batty
Thread ID: 7337 | Posts: 18 | Started: 2003-06-14
2003-06-14 06:19 | User Profile
Since Ayn Rand and her "works" seem to be getting (too much) mention here at OD lately, as a public service for those who need a refresher, or who haven't read ATLAS SHRUGGED, here is the abridged version. Sums it all up.
[url=http://www.spudworks.com/article/66/2/]http://www.spudworks.com/article/66/2/[/url]
THE ABRIDGED ATLAS SHRUGGED
"It sure is hard to find good men now-a-days. I wonder what the hell is going on," Dagny smirked to herself as she entered the towering monolith to capitalism that was the headquarters of Taggart Transcontinental. "There are so few men like Hank Rearden, the man who single handedly invented a new greenish tint metal that is far stronger than steel," she said bursting in on her brother. "There are too many like you, Jim," she mocked.
"Well, if that's the case, you so-not-a-woman-and-I-can't-believe-a-woman-wrote-this, why don't you go redeem yourself by sleeping with him. By being his servile little mistress you'll serve the cause of capitalism far better than you have," Jim mocked.
Dagny smirked in her mocking way. Yes, she thought, she had tried that with another man, and it seemed so right until he, gasp, went to the other side. He became a slacker. Hank. Hank, Hank, Hank. Don't you know you're all I dream about though I don't actually do anything about until page five-hundred? "I know what I want Jim, but what do you want?"
"Who is John Galt?"
"Don't say that! It's people asking that question that leads me to believe something sinister is happening in society. I think he's the destroyer." She mocked herself silently inside. How could a grown woman think such a thing? Oh, who was she kidding? She knew that women weren't much better than children anyway. Everyone knew that. It was a fluke she had any position in the railroad at all.
"It is I, Francisco d'Anconia, of the oldest most wealthy copper fortune this side of the Atlantic, and don't I want you to know that I'm pissing it all away for a grand reason that I won't tell you!" His perfect physique burst through the door in a mocking manner few could achieve but which he achieved perfectly. He had seen someone do the act before and fail and, after a single try at six months old, was better at mockingly bursting through doors than anyone on the planet.
"Slacker," Dagny screamed with indignation and a pointed finger.
"Yes Dagny, you silly silly woman, I may seem a slacker to you, but after ten pages of explanation you will know that it is you who slack and it is I who serve a higher cause which will not be explained for another seven hundred pages. Remember, I am a d'Anconia which goes without saying that I know what I am doing," he mocked. He was so perfect at mocking. No man mocked like Francisco. How she wanted to be back in his arms. Were it not for? no! He was a slacker! The very embodiment of slack yet? yet he slacked with purpose. Even that was perfect. No man slacked like Francisco.
"What in capitalism's name is going on here," Hank yelled with bursting anger from the bottom of his manly lungs as he lunged through the door. It wasn't as perfect as Francisco's mockery, no man could touch that, but it was with the kind of power only a capitalist could muster. Dagny fluttered with lust.
"What the hell are you all doing in my office," Jim demanded weekly, the way only a socialist could demand.
"Hank, we must talk," Francisco said in a softly mocking way. Hank's heart fluttered with love he suddenly felt for the man. Even if he was a slacker, could my heart be wrong, Hank asked himself. He reached for Francisco's hand, wanting to hold him close.
"No," Dagny screamed with indignation and a pointed finger. "Please, I want him to take me and show me what a week little girl I really am! That's what all women want!" Hank looked torn.
"Hey everybody," said a quiet voice from behind Hank. Hank took up most of the doorway with his manly capitalistic bulk. The crowd parted like the sea and a well groomed handsome man with a shock of boyish blond hair stood at the foot of it.
"John, you're not supposed to show up for eight-hundred more pages," Francisco said mockingly.
"Well, I got bored with the wait and figured what the hell. So? who wants to know what this is all about?" John smiled and every man's heart in the room melted. Dagny felt the overwhelming urge to become his servant and to clean up after him. That's what all women wanted after all, she figured.
"I do," Rearden capitalisticly demanded.
"Well, I couldn't deal with any government intervention in business and thought that any kind of socialist tendency was kind of a bad idea, so me and my buddies, who all just happen to be the rich, powerful, and industrial, went on strike to bring the world to its knees." John said it has he tossed back his blond hair with a light twitch of his head.
"For what purpose," Jim nearly cried. Socialists are such babies, thought John mockingly.
"Well, I don't like having to pay taxes or think about anything other than business. And, because I'm such an inexplicably charismatic guy, I figured I'd just my industrialist guys to back me," John said with a hint of mockery.
"Look," Jim sobbed. "The world is crumbling without you guys!"
"Well, once it's toast, we'll get to work but until then, who's up for some skiing in Colorado?"
2003-06-14 06:24 | User Profile
Thanks Roy! You've spared me from having to actually read this turd of a novel. :lol:
2003-06-15 07:41 | User Profile
Still too long; didn't read.
2003-06-15 16:26 | User Profile
*Originally posted by Drakmal@Jun 15 2003, 01:41 * ** Still too long; didn't read. **
:lol:
Ok, I'll condense it even further:
Atlas Shrugged (or [u]anything[/u] written by Alissa Rosenbaum) = :dung:
And about that ad :lol: ...is that real? Or is it from one of Conan's phony "real" ad bits?
2003-06-15 16:31 | User Profile
Originally posted by Kurt@Jun 15 2003, 09:26 * *Ok, I'll condense it even further:
Atlas Shrugged (or [u]anything[/u] written by Alissa Rosenbaum) = :dung:**
Further reduction:
Alissa Rosenbaum = :dung:
2003-06-15 16:49 | User Profile
*Originally posted by madrussian@Jun 15 2003, 10:31 * ** Further reduction:
Alissa Rosenbaum = :dung: **
:lol:
Then, since she was a Jew, we can also derive that: Jews = :dung:
Reductio ad excrement :D
2003-06-15 19:51 | User Profile
Originally posted by Kurt@Jun 15 2003, 09:49 * *Jews = :dung: **
You shouldn't generalize :lol:
2003-06-15 20:20 | User Profile
Originally posted by madrussian+Jun 15 2003, 15:51 -->
QUOTE (madrussian @ Jun 15 2003, 15:51 ) <!--QuoteBegin-Kurt@Jun 15 2003, 09:49 * *Jews = :dung: ** You shouldn't generalize :lol: **
Absolutely right, MR. I promise to stop generalizing from this time forward, so I guess that means I'll respect every pile of turds as an individual. All we are saying is give turds a chance.
madrussian
2003-06-15 20:31 | User Profile
You must pledge to never:
Identify any group because not 100% of them are like that.
Identify yourself as a member of a group, which doesn't exist.
Use any statistics broken down by any variable because we are all individuals.
Mix Zionism and Jews, which have no relation to each other.
Hope to replace politicians in DC with ones representing you, because then you'd be a statist.
Complain about affirmative action, because the whites who compete for government jobs are losers and don't deserve your pity or support.
etc. etc. etc.
madrussian
2003-06-15 20:40 | User Profile
After posting on LF for more than a year, I must say that the initial belief that there are good libertarians has come to an end. The slurs like "statist" or "collectivist" are as meaningless as "antisemite", just as the people who use them are as dangerous to the health of the society as Jews.
How many libertarians are there in Israel, cheering the Arabs and calling for open borders?
Edana
2003-06-15 20:56 | User Profile
There are no individuals, only aggregates of cells. A "person" is an illusory entity, a name we attach to a collection of cells.
Anti-Yuppie, mind if I engage in a little intellectual theft for my sig?
Edana
2003-06-15 21:11 | User Profile
Thanks for the new sig!
OWK is the quintessential individualist dogmatic. Fancies himself a "Rational" anarchist.
Campion Moore Boru
2003-06-16 00:14 | User Profile
Great post MR :th:
You left one out:
- Imposing border control is a statist function, and merits no support. The true solution is to end social entitlements. No action should be taken on this issue until the Libertarian party controls Congress, which should happen next year. :drool:
madrussian
2003-06-16 00:21 | User Profile
- Freedom of association can be practiced by anyone but whites, first because there is no such thing as white, and second, the only way whites can freely associate is by mass expulsion and murder of those who can freely associate but choose to live among whites because they like to (and third, because any white wanting to associate with other whites would be a racist, and racists are bad people, much worse than felons (especially felons who swindle others out of billions of dollars and aren't actually felons but enterpreneurs))
Campion Moore Boru
2003-06-16 00:43 | User Profile
Maybe we should lift whole sections of sqOWK's essays on Liberty? ;)
If sqOWK had ever met Tom Paine, he would've been gutted by the latter within 5 minutes.
Any educated American who cannot compete with coolie/slave labor at $.50 an hour is a lazy, worthless American who deserves no support.
Tax benefits for family owned business is alternatively socialistic or facist, hence always Statist. Benefits for Multi-National corporations who rightly feel no allegiance to any Statist notion of "country" or "nation" and contract work to individualists in depressed nations, are the highest form of Free Trade.
Bolshevism redux, no?
Franco
2003-06-16 00:43 | User Profile
Hey, where is my post?
Valley Forge
2003-06-16 23:03 | User Profile
*Originally posted by madrussian@Jun 16 2003, 00:21 * ** 8. Freedom of association can be practiced by anyone but whites, first because there is no such thing as white, and second, the only way whites can freely associate is by mass expulsion and murder of those who can freely associate but choose to live among whites because they like to (and third, because any white wanting to associate with other whites would be a racist, and racists are bad people, much worse than felons (especially felons who swindle others out of billions of dollars and aren't actually felons but enterpreneurs)) **
LOL. You nailed it, MR.
Franco
2003-06-16 23:08 | User Profile
Leland -- I had a post here about libertarians, it was kinda funny. But I guess that powers-that-be at OD found it too offensive....
Maybe they would allow me to re-post it at Members Only? Hmm?