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All about father’s sons and mama’s boys...

Thread ID: 11834 | Posts: 5 | Started: 2004-01-10

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Avalanche [OP]

2004-01-10 20:25 | User Profile

Here's a discussion, partly relating to the following three essays, from the courting emails between me, Avalanche and NeoNietzsche:

We were discussing (blues guitarist) Stevie Ray Vaughan and his older brother Jimmie. I had expressed my... discomfort... with Stevie’s seemingly rootless, goal-less self; that had SRV NOT been born a guitar god, he’d probably have been knocking over convenience stores... And so how could I find him a god?!

NeoNietzsche wrote: [QUOTE]Let me gently take issue with your analysis of the might-have-beens of SRV’s life. “Crossfire” tells his uncle Joe Boy Cook’s story of having been told not to leave little Steve alone while taking him along for grocery shopping. When uncle Joe’s skepticism led him to experiment with hiding from the little guy momentarily, he was rewarded with a squeal of terror that left him in no doubt as to the boy’s fundamental insecurity. The authors speak of Stevie as a momma’s boy, wanting to be coddled and cuddled, and fearful of ever being left alone. He desperately longed for Jimmie’s approval, and bore a sense of shame and guilt acquired from his home environment that burdened him, even in the midst of performances that were launching his audiences into the emotional stratosphere.

Though Stevie had immense physical strength and was Mucho Hombre with the ladies (attesting to his full hormonal endowment), it was Jimmie who was emotionally tough like his father and might well have been a “thug,” but for his gift. If this picture of Stevie was accurate, then my sense of his fate without his music would have been one of his relying, first, on his friends and lovers for his indulgences (and I think he had a charismatic loveableness about him, aside from his gift) and only, secondly, thieving for the wherewithal for the pursuit of his habits. It’s difficult for me to see this Stevie doing “hold-ups,” and, in fact, I’m inclined to take the point that he was so dedicated to his craft, from a very early age and through thick and thin, that, if it’s fair to say that someone IS what he does, it might well be said of SRV that “he WAS the music.”

On a personal note, I do have a sense of identification with the brothers, based on my own experience growing up in a lower-middle-class home at the same time in a Southern metropolis. I’m just a few months older than Jimmie and likewise am the “big” brother of what was, for eleven years, just the two of us. Though my younger brother was only a year, rather than four, behind me, he was the equivalent of four years behind in size and intellect. When I see that photo of little Jimmie and Steve holding their guitars, I see a Christmas photo of myself and my brother with our six-shooters, unholstered from our complete Roy Rodgers outfits and pointed at the camera. A precious moment of harmony in an otherwise acrimonious atmosphere.

All this (and much more of a parallel nature) is by way of saying that I think I have a sense of both the brothers’ personalities from having “been there.” I concede the point that Stevie’s marital faithlessness, as opposed to just sleeping around with casual partners, does not speak in his favor, as do not the events that caused the parting with Cutter Brandenburg -- but, on balance, I think I have not misjudged the “essential” Stevie in his loveable vulnerability, charity, and well-meaningness. I could not “love” Jimmie or weep for him, on the other hand, because his inward toughness arouses, instead, my respect as a straight male (a territorial competitor, as it were).[/QUOTE] I wrote: [QUOTE]I can’t support the picture of SRV as the momma’s boy — his momma doesn’t seem to have been real available to him, nor his dad or brother (guessing from the books). And a fear of being alone doesn’t (to me) define a momma’s boy: I think of loneliness and fear of being alone belonging to the youngest (speaking of birth order — I’m yer typical tortured unloved middle). I don’t associate it with being a momma’s boy — which I more associate with a desire to be indoors, near mom, wanting to spend lots of time with her — not wanting to grow up and move away (which Stevie actually DID). I think a momma’s boy wouldn’t have the complete focus and dedication to music that he did.

Talk to me about how you see Jimmie and Stevie differing in their growing up/temperments — give me the view of a male toward upper/younger bros — is Stevie’s hero worship likely or not?[/QUOTE] NeoN wrote: [QUOTE]Let me tell you of momma’s boys and father’s sons as two poles of a continuum in which each boy/man takes his own place. The “momma’s boy” of which I speak is not so by virtue of his treatment by others, but by virtue of his vital, inborn need. He indispensably needs his mother’s love and esteem as a youngster, to have the courage to face the world as a young man. If he feels that he has that affection from her, he is outwardly courageous and betrays not a need to be near her, except in inward spirit throughout his life. (If he’s black, he’ll be especially sensitive to the ubiquitous taunt of “motherf^cker,” since taunts even that are figuratively true do cut to the quick, nevertheless.) He is a lover, not a fighter (in the sense of a soldier), and his wife will be a friend/companion and a mother to him, of whose affections (rather than of her body) he will be jealous when it happens that he is betrayed.

His older brother, on the other hand, needs to openly prove his manhood — of which his father is, initially, the formidable measure to be mastered. His mother’s attentions mean relatively little to him — because objective, competitive measures of his worth are important instead, not the indiscriminate affection of an uncritical older woman. He is a fighter, not a lover, and his wife will be a possession and so a subordinate (even if she is a queen before whom he falls to his knees in worship of her beauty and mystique). His poor younger brother is the frequent victim of his arbitrary and cruel transmission of that which is held by folk wisdom only to roll downhill. So loving little bro’ often suffers from “abused child syndrome” and so idolizes/idealizes his heavily-armed tormentor in self-protective response.

These things I claim to know from personal experience and observation.[/QUOTE]

Texas Dissident

2004-01-10 20:42 | User Profile

Off-topic, but since Jimmie Vaughn is mentioned here, let me take the opportunity to plug his guitar solo contributing on Junior Brown's "My Wife Thinks You're Dead." It's just fantastic and one of my favorites.

Avalanche

2004-01-11 03:03 | User Profile

Yeah, Stevie always SWORE that Jimmie was the best guitarist in the world. He idolized him!

I prefer the fire and skill of Stevie to the more nuanced Jimmie. (So does Neo.)

Was it in Crossfire (a Stevie bio) that they describe "Mr. Grace and Restraint" (JLV) getting together with "Louie-kablooie over the top" (SRV). I loved that!

Texas Dissident

2004-01-11 08:59 | User Profile

[QUOTE=Avalanche]I prefer the fire and skill of Stevie to the more nuanced Jimmie. (So does Neo.)[/QUOTE]

If I'm not mistaken, I believe Jimmie is a finger-picker a la flamenco style and Stevie used a pick. Completely different styles and Jimmie's as you say, "nuanced" one goes perfectly with Brown's song I mentioned above. Good stuff.

Just a little sidenote really and an opportunity to plug Junior Brown. All of 'em are/were Texas boys. :cowboy:

Avalanche

2004-01-12 00:28 | User Profile

No no -- Stevie's pickin' fingers were calloused to a fair thee well! He used to, if his callous fell off -- put a drop of superglue on his fingers, lay them against his forearm, wait till it dried and rrrrriiiiiippppp a new "callous" off his forearm!

And apparently Jimmie can play ANY style, including Stevie's hell-for-leather style.

Yeah, Texans are often great! It's was the "cultural difference" between me and (what I understood from reading and studying was) Stevie that made me realize I needed a culturally DIFFERENT man from the ones I'd always considered -- and then I was found by Neo! Neo is culturally different from me (southern, rather than Texan, but the two types share a lot of cultural traits).