← Autodidact Archive · Original Dissent · Ed Toner
Thread ID: 11696 | Posts: 3 | Started: 2004-01-02
2004-01-02 01:52 | User Profile
THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
Over the many years scholars have pondered over why God gave the Ten Commandments to the Jews rather than anyone else ... this may finally shed some light on that question....
HOW THE JEWS GOT THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
God went to the Germans and said, "I have Commandments for you that
will make your lives better."
And the Germans asked, "What are Commandments?"
And the Lord said, "They are rules for living."
"Can you give us an example?"
"Thou shalt not kill."
"Not kill? We're not interested."
So He went to the Italians and said, "I have Commandments." And the Italians wanted an example, and the Lord said, "Thou shalt not steal." "Not steal? We're not interested."
He went to the French and said, "I have Commandments." The French wanted an example and the Lord said, "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife. "Not covet my neighbor's wife? We're not interested."
He went to the Jews and said, "I have Commandments." "Commandments?" they said, "how much are they?" "They're free." "We'll take 10."
2004-01-02 05:56 | User Profile
And it came to pass:
That the Germans kicked the Roman's arses and thus became powerful and strong that the Hebrew was afraid and therefore conspired with the enemies of nature against the strong and healthy.
And the stupid, by way of the Lord, sent the multitude, like the vicious little ant, to consume the wolf, by reason of number.
And disease spread throughout our kingdoms and consumed our people like a plague and killed the little children and their mothers in vast number.
Thereafter the Hebrew prospered and fed their numerous little ants the sugar of their approbation and congratulated themselves in their strange ceremonies. And the stupid little ants were happy.
2004-01-02 12:51 | User Profile
And so were the Uncles.